I was on a suicide rampage until God's Love stepped in!

I believe there are spirits of addiction. Why do you think liquor stores have signs that say: “Wine & Spirits”? Even the world acknowledges that drinking is somehow associated with evil spirits. It opens the door for demons to come in and take control. That’s why people say and do things when they are under the influence of drugs or alcohol that they would never do while sober.I have visited countless inmates who have been incarcerated for crimes they could not recall. One lady passed out behind the wheel of her car, and when she awoke, she was told she had killed a family of four. For the next forty years, she was locked up and tormented with not even being able to remember the incident that put her in prison.I recall as a child in my own household, observing my mother act like a puppet on a string, unable to control her own actions. She did things she could not remember and refused to believe them even if she could remember. I knew there was demoniac activity going on, and I wasn’t even a Christian at that time. There was this sense of darkness lurking over our family. I felt it had been there for previous generations, but I did not know how to explain these things.I have learned, the word drug comes from the word pharmacy. It is derived from the Greek word pharmakeia, which means medicine or drugs that inhibit a person’s personality or change his behavior. These can also be called mind-altering drugs. In English, this refers to drugs given to provide temporary relief. This word is also associated with witchcraft, sorcery and magic. It more specifically means to be under the influence, particularly of evil spirits. Alcohol is a drug with the same kind of effects, which is why in the olden days, alcohol was used as medicine to numb pain during surgery or was given to someone who was very ill as they awaited death.In Proverbs 31:6, it says to give wine to those who are dying. When Jesus was hanging on the cross, a soldier tried to give Him such a mixture to help numb the suffering and pain. But Jesus refused it because He would not allow anything of this world to have control or influence over Him, even in His death.

The Bible tells us that spirits and alcohol go hand-in-hand.

I personally believe any form of substance abuse has evil spirits attached to it, and when one dabbles with booze or drugs, the demons are just waiting for that open door to come in and dominate that person’s life. I have seen the same spirits of addiction move down from one generation to another, especially in my own family. I have family members who never drank, but when they took that first drink, they became a full-blown alcoholics! I know it was not just in the genes; there were spirits assigned to our family members, waiting for that open door to come in and to dominate.My biological dad was consumed with gambling and alcohol. He died an early death at thirty-six years old when he was killed as a result of his addictions. This destroyed my mother. She was tormented for years, thinking maybe it was a “staged death” and he would come back to her eventually when it wasn’t hot with the mob or the cops. Though I barely knew him, his life and death had a lasting impression on our family. Our family suffered tremendously over mom’s “tears in the beer” lifestyle. She was trying to raise five children in a strange town without any form of income. We depended on her as our only caretaker, but instead, we were caring for her and running the household. We were children forced into adulthood too early!

I experienced demoniac activity firsthand as an addict.

I was so desperate for a high. There was always this drive pushing me to get high. I remember a vision I once had after sniffing paint thinner (or whatever it was because I was so desperate for a high). In this vision, I saw myself living a lifestyle of prostitution and that it was my destiny. I saw it so clearly. It was as though there was a movie screen right in front of me. But if I had followed that course for my life, I know I would not be here today to tell about it. Without God’s divine intervention, it was just a matter of time before that vision became a reality in my life.I ran away from home and joined a gang of misfits and from that moment. I lived in fear.

I carried a brick in my shoulder bag, a switchblade in my boot, and I wore brass knuckles or big rings most of the time.

When I was at home with my family and wasn’t on one of my “runs” (I ran away thirteen times beginning at the age of 11 until I left home for good at 15), I couldn’t wait for the man who brought my mom home from the bar to mess with me or to think he was going to take advantage of my mom. I had such anger that it was destructive to everyone in my path. I lived with a “payback” mentality toward all men. I guess this was deep rooted from never having a father who stuck around and from witnessing all the pain my mother suffered just wanting to be loved by a man. She just kept picking the wrong man!Thank God, someone was praying for me! I was on a suicide rampage—the ultimate goal of the enemy. I started envisioning my funeral and staging my death. I was so tired of the drugs and felt there was no way out. The thought of death started to appeal to me. I found out years later that my mom’s siblings in St. Louis, Missouri, were interceding for all of us. I believe their prayers saved my life!John 10:10 says the thief (Satan) is out to rob, to kill and destroy us.

 I believe that drugs and alcohol are the biggest way the enemy steals, kills and destroys today.

I have very few party buddies who are even alive and if they are, they’re either incarcerated or have become Christians, too. Addiction is truly a life or death situation. We are playing Russian roulette when we are trapped in addictions. Russian roulette is when you put a gun to your head and pull the trigger over and over until someone yells, “Roulette.” There’s only one bullet, so you have a good chance of survival for a while, that is, until you keep pulling that trigger. Eventually, it will be the loaded one you pull—then it’s goodbye to everything! This is the enemy’s plan from the beginning, to silence your witness for Christ. Addiction is like a game of roulette, but addiction is not a game!If mankind is set on destroying itself, then the devil has done his job. This is a battle that is older than time, the battle between Christ and the fallen angel, Lucifer. Satan is self-deceived, thinking somehow he can defeat Christ, when Christ has already won the battle. It is a done deal! It is over! Satan’s days are numbered. So his goal is to add to his kingdom and take out as many human beings (made in the image of God) as he can as he is on his way to eternal agony and damnation. Why? Because misery loves company and he is most miserable, knowing his time is so short! Some say this sounds like a far-fetched movie, but it is the Bible nevertheless. I’ve known demons, and now I know Christ. There are certain spirits that I have been so familiar with that I can see them instantly, such as lust and alcoholism. But it doesn’t matter what spirits I can see, it matters that Christ lives in me now. It is important that I share what He has done for me to save others from a life destined to hell--and yes, even a life of hell on earth trapped in addictions!

When we dare to believe that Jesus Christ has set us free and redeemed us, the devil can no longer destroy our lives.

Our eyes become wide open as the truth of God’s Word begins to flood our hearts with heaven’s light. We can see clearly. We are no longer deceived. There is no more bondage when we can see what Christ has done for us and we humbly accept His restoration power. Then we can start speaking and using our authority when we submit ourselves to God, resist the devil and watch him flee in terror, as it says in James 4:7.When you have a personal experience with Christ, you will know that you are loved and you have a Father who will never abandon you or let you go. When I realized that God would take care of me and protect me, I didn’t have to run any more, I didn’t have to fight anymore, I didn’t have to be afraid any more, and I didn’t have to try and kill myself anymore. His love truly did ransom me. He saves us from destruction. His love changes us from the inside out!