Protecting Your Mind: 3 Steps to Break Negative Thought Cycles
“Ministers are among the most overworked and underpaid members of the workforce, and for many in this occupation, stress and burnout lead to mental health problems.”
We hear the statistics continually about ministers who have exited ministry because they have simply “had enough.”
They are unable to cope with the mental stress and torment that the dark side of ministry sometimes brings.
I was grieved recently when I read a post from a minister, who had served in Pastoral ministry for many years. He grew up in a Pastor’s home and had experienced excellence results in his previous ministry assignments. But eventually the stress of ministry wore him down to the place that he decided walking away from ministry was the only choice of survival for he and his family.
“A few months ago, I resigned from the church I was pastoring. It was an extremely hard pastorate and a situation that was abusive toward us as a family. Although I had other churches asking me to consider their open pastor positions, the emotional and physical toll had already taken my ability to continue pastoring at this time in my life. After twenty-seven years of full time Pastoral ministry, the time had come for me and my sweet family to heal. I knew that I needed it, and my family needed it also.”
This Pastor’s story is being played out over and over among the ministerial ranks. It’s obvious that an intensified demon spirit of confusion, lawlessness, immorality, and rebellion has been unleashed in our world over the last three years. As ministers we are called to run toward the battle and provide answers to the confused, deliverance to the bound, and hope to the fearful. Yet, at the same time, we also live in this world of chaos, therefore, we are not immune from Satan’s attacks.
Much like the common complaints from families of other professionals; the plumber’s wife has to continually navigate a clogged sink, while her husband is unclogging someone else’s drain. The electrician’s family deals with little nagging issues while dad is out servicing other’s electrical needs. And the minister is out bringing hope and comfort to the broken and traumatized, while he and his family are suffering emotionally, but unable to reveal their pain because that is not what spiritual leaders do.
Yet for the minister’s family, the denial or neglect of emotional pain that accompanies ministry trauma cannot be remedied with a quick fix of an unclogged sink or a simple part replacement of a malfunctioned circuit breaker. When a minister and his family encounter demonically influenced attacks, the pain and suffering can leave permanent emotional marks unless properly dealt with and healed.
The church world as a whole, and especially the full gospel groups have arrived late to the realization that our mental and emotional health is included in the atoning work of Christ on the cross and needs to be emphasized.
I remember attending my first leadership conference in 1980 in Memphis, TN. The discussion by the presiding leaders toward the end of the day’s sessions ventured into the topic of a minister’s emotional health and the role of the organization to help ministers who encountered emotional difficulties.
Being a young minister and attending my first leadership conference, I was mesmerized by the “bigger than life” pastors that spoke in the sessions. I listened as one esteemed Pastor, shared how he recommended people suffering mental and emotional trauma to a licensed counselor, and that also would be a good practice for any minister who was experiencing the same type of issues.
His recommendation was quickly rebuffed by several ministers who voiced their opposition, stating that “more emphasis on praying through and tarrying at the altar was all that was needed.” I concluded that the overwhelming majority of the ministers present were appalled at the idea of a Spirit filled minister needing to see a counselor. The panel leader ended the discussion by encouraging all the ministers to pray for any minister who “had that problem.”
Seven years later, while pastoring my first church, I encountered a demonic attack of mental torment that I had never before experienced in my life. After weeks of trying to “pray through” and tarrying for hours at the altar, I couldn’t get my mind to shut off. The accusatory, critical, and fearful thoughts raced through my mind like machine gun bullets.
Finally in desperation I made an appointment to see my spiritual authorities at the headquarter office. I shared with them my story and though very compassionate toward me, they offered no suggestions for remedy, other than I needed to take two weeks off.
So, I did what they suggested, and after two weeks away, I wasn’t any better. My location was not my problem, my mind was my problem, and I didn’t’ know how to harness runaway thoughts.
I was raised in a Pentecostal environment. I was taught what to wear and where to go, but I had never been taught, “what to think.”
Satan’s Modus Operandi: Our Thought Life
Satan operates in the arena of thought. He doesn’t telegraph his attack on ministers by showing up at our homes in a devil suit carrying a pitchfork, but he shows up, nonetheless. He surfaces with thoughts of accusation, replays of our failures, remembering words of unjust criticism or betrayal, unfair comparison to others, and the memory of any other hurtful event or conversation that tries to steal our joy and peace.
“Praying through to victory” is a wonderful spiritual experience. I have encountered God’s presence and freedom in prayer a multitude of times. But I soon learned that in dealing with emotional and mental upheaval, when you finally pray through, the battle is not over.
Especially as a pastor, I can pray through the hurt today, but the issue that brought the trauma or stress doesn’t immediately go away. Satan is just waiting for us to exit our prayer closet to begin the accusations, doubts, and fears all over again.
The Apostle Paul gave us insight into the ongoing mental and emotional battle that we face continually.
“Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:6-7 NLT).
Paul informs us that effective prayer will alleviate the torment which worry unleashes on our minds and I found this to be true. As I prayed about the troubling issues I encountered as a Pastor, I found God’s presence comforting and a respite from the trauma and drama of church issues. As long as I was in my prayer closet, I was protected and isolated from the emotional harassment. But unfortunately, we don’t live in our prayer closet, we must come out into the real, broken world again.
Paul understood this mental and emotional dilemma and penned the next verse.
And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise (Philippians 4:8 NLT).
Paul says once we have “prayed through,” we have one final thing to do, “we must harness our thoughts and think correctly.”
Satan understands his influence over us is severely limited when we enter our prayer closet. So, he waits, and as soon as we exit, he will trigger a thought concerning that area of pain that we have been struggling with, and the comfort we so wonderfully enjoyed in prayer will dissipate. That’s why Paul informs us that after we pray, we have one final thing to do. We must learn to control our thought life.
Maintaining our Mental Health
The number of ministers vacating ministry assignments due to immoral actions are heartbreaking to hear. Weekly it seems, we read another story of a high-profile minister who has not won the battle with immoral temptation, and therefore resigned or was dismissed from their ministry. And though those stories receive the media headlines, the number of pastors and ministers stepping away from ministry due to immoral actions, are minor compared to the hundreds who are exiting ministry annually due to the emotional and mental stress of ministry.
The Barna Group released a study from March 2022 which reveals that almost half of all Pastors have seriously considered leaving the ministry in the previous twelve months. That percentage has increased dramatically since 2021.
These alarming numbers for the increased dissatisfaction in our ministerial ranks, is not caused by some horrific sin, or even the sub-par pay that ministers are accustomed to receiving. The heartbreaking exodus from ministry, is being caused by the mental and emotional stress in our present culture, that now has found its way also into the Pastor’s home.
As ministers, how do we maintain our mental and emotional health? Is it a lack of spirituality to admit that we struggle with anxiety? Who can we confide in, and to whom can we reveal our fearful and tormenting thoughts? How can we protect our minds and the minds of our family from the trauma that we encounter in ministry?
Humbly admit your humanity.
I have a newsflash for you, as a minister and especially as a Pastor, you are not a spiritual superman. We serve a powerful, supernatural God, but we are human, vessels of clay. We too, are susceptible to the anxieties and stresses of our culture, just as our parishioners. We understand that ministers are the “go to” persons when life’s toughest moments come our way. And we must be equipped and ready to bring hope and comfort to those hurting and needing our help. But when we step away from our ministerial office, we are husband, wife, mom and dad, mere humans who face the “stuff” in life, just as those we serve.
Experiencing anxiety and struggling with fear is not an indictment against our calling or ministry. Finding oneself in a season of despair today doesn’t disqualify us from ministry fulfillment tomorrow. It’s okay to admit when we are facing a tough season and need help. I have never seen a church’s health decrease because a pastor was honest about their struggles, but I have seen parishioners scatter when a pastor refuses to admit his ministry is suffering because of the pain he and his family are experiencing.
When we as ministers deny the reality that anxiety, hurt, confusion, and even addiction can invade our homes, we prolong the deliverance and healing that is available in Christ and through His body. We also position our families to suffer alone when Satan’s attacks come their way. Often minister’s families have learned not to speak about their pain or torment because it may shed a negative light upon their ministry or the church.
The patriarchs of old didn’t arrive at a place of sainthood and become amazing servants of God because they had their “act together.” In contrast, they admitted their weaknesses and their fears, and allowed the Holy Spirit to conform them to the image of Christ.
It is true, we ministers have the supernatural Jesus on the inside of us, but this indescribable gift is wrapped up in a vessel of clay that is not immune from the stresses of an evil culture. We ministers can maintain our mental health when we admit our humanity.
Resist the temptation of isolation.
Years ago, I experienced a season of heartbreak in ministry. Ministers and friends who I had believed in, recommended, and supported, betrayed me, and intentionally acted in ways that cost the ministry in which I was leading thousands of dollars. I was ashamed that I had not caught this deceptive scheme. The mental torment I experienced during that season was unrelenting. Sleep escaped me, scenes of the betrayal replayed over and over again in my mind. Anxiety and condemning thoughts invaded every moment of my day. A deceptive hopelessness descended on me which prohibited me from seeing any way of escape other than running away. So, I ran away and resigned from my assignment.
Unfortunately, I didn’t run for help, because I was too ashamed, and I was convinced everyone was against me for my error in judgment. Instead, I ran into isolation. I distanced myself from everyone.
Isolation is a deceptive tactic that Satan uses which promises relief, but in reality, isolation separates us from voices of help and encouragement.
Isolation is a scheme of the devil to keep us away from any voice but his. If he can keep us isolated, the only narrative we hear about our pain is the narrative that Satan writes.
As I look back upon that tormenting season in my life, I regret not having the courage and understanding to break through the temptation to run away and hide. If I could do it all over again, I would have found some trusted voice to speak into my moment of heartbreak. That voice couldn’t change the events that brought me and my family pain, but it would have been a voice that reminded me of God’s mercy and help instead of the deafening voice of condemnation that I was hearing.
We ministers can maintain our mental health, if we have the courage to engage help in times of anxiety and doubt, instead of isolating ourselves because of shame or guilt.
Place a priority on protecting your thought life!
Protecting our minds from lustful, fearful, condemning, tormenting and unhealthy thoughts must be a priority for ministers. Our world is slipping into madness. The foundational principles of a Judeo-Christian culture which most of us have been fortunate to live and minister under, are now starting to deteriorate. Unreasonable has become reasonable, unnatural has become natural, and what we once considered radical and unthinkable has now become mainstream.
In the past, the demons of deception would try to subtly find an entrance through the back door, but those days are over. The deception which has now been unleashed on humanity is unashamedly brutal. The minds of our family and the families of our church are his target. We must understand the seriousness and importance of protecting our headspace and taking our thoughts captive.
The Apostle Paul told the Corinthians to “take every thought captive” (2 Cor. 10:5).
Paul also wrote to the Philippians, “Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise” (Philippians 4:8).
Paul underscores the importance of godly thinking when he writes to the Romans and reminds them that transformation takes place in the child of God when they “renew their minds” (Romans 12:2).
Protecting our minds from lustful, fearful, condemning, tormenting, and unhealthy thoughts must become a priority for every minister. Thought discipline is a daily exercise. It’s not only a subject we should preach about, but a reality that we must live out in our personal lives.
Maybe the thoughts you are struggling with are not laced with immoral behavior or some shameful sin. But what about the fearful thoughts? What about the replays of the conversations that we can’t seem to escape of the parishioner who decided to leave because of our lack of being able to minister to their family?
What about the doubts that try to invade our minds like a tsunami, when we see the amazing crowds and victories of other churches and ministers, and yet we seem stuck and helpless to get our church moving forward?
What about the fear that tries to encompass our homes, when one of our children exhibit questions of faith and begin exploring things against which we have biblically warned? Who do we talk to and to whom can we turn and voice our feelings without the fear of unfair exposure?
We are our best when we are experiencing health in our minds. But Satan is working overtime to prevent God’s servants from enjoying peace of mind. We ministers can maintain mental and emotional freedom, by humbly admitting our humanity, resisting the temptation to isolate, and placing a priority on protecting our thought life.
